It is fitting that The Search for Significance by Robert S. McGee, Word Publishing, Nashville, updated 2003, is my first book review on Christian Codependent Victor.
Many years ago, I was very unhappy. Depression, anxiety, fear, resentment and worry were always catching up to me.
My church was having a study group of McGee’s book and since I liked learning, I decided to join up. I had no idea that decision would begin my journey toward a healthier soul.
Our souls are comprised of our minds, wills and emotions. Doesn’t everyone want to be healthy there as well as in our bodies?
Mr. McGee introduces the subject by declaring that we are all searching to feel loved and appreciated. When we don’t receive what our heart naturally aches for, especially as children, we begin to believe we must be undeserving. As we then try to attain value at any cost, our lives and relationships fail and we end up miserable.
What we are looking for is a reason for our existence; someone or something to live for. It translates to our self-worth or self-esteem. McGee calls it significance. It’s the quality of having a meaning, importance or purpose according to Webster’s Dictionary.
To recall my childhood was not something I wanted to do, but The Search for Significance made me think about when I first began the believe the lie, “I must be approved by certain others to feel good about myself” (p.26).
In order to live our best life in the present, we must look into our past to understand our own feelings and behavior. The Search for Significance helped me see the lies I was believing that caused negative emotions to rise in me. McGee counters each lie with the truth of the God’s Word. Then we have a choice: Are we going to believe God or someone else?
Robert S. McGee was a professional counselor and lecturer. Even though he had counseled many successfully and obviously was a believer, his book does not sound preachy. He includes himself when he says “all of us” have these tendencies and “our” problems stem from believing the lies (p.30).
McGee gives many examples from his counseling experiences to help us realize we are not alone in our pain and confusion. He reveals scripture showing that God loves us as we are and He wants to have an honest relationship with us. That is the path to emotional healing.
This book made me aware of deep seated wrong beliefs that made my life unmanageable. When I discovered that I could replace the lies with the truth and have more joy, I was captivated. McGee gets to the core of our self-induced misery – our thoughts. He aptly uses the word picture, “the light comes on” (p.1) to describe looking honestly inward.
The author tells us, “As Christians, our fulfillment in this life depends not on our skills to avoid life’s problems but on our ability to apply God’s specific solutions to those problems” (p.10).
McGee devotes 8 out of 13 chapters to 4 false beliefs, their consequences and God’s answers. Each false belief leads to a fear, and he gives a 10 question test to see if we have this fear and at what level. One can discover how these 4 lies have negatively impacted his or her life. Then the book shows how to overcome these falsehoods through the love, forgiveness and acceptance of Christ.
God’s answers to these falsehoods are detailed, yet simple to understand and backed by scripture.
The last 3 chapters are a workbook which gives us an opportunity to personally study the topic in more depth.
The Search for Significance series has a family of products which include a devotional journal and a youth edition.
There are over three million copies in print. On the cover, a famous evangelist says, “The Search for Significance should be read by every Christian.” I agree with Billy Graham.
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